Torn
by Eevee Tofu
Summary: Now that you're gone, I'm only half the boy I used to be. - Cheesy, angsty, sappy, fluffy post-canon fic. Puzz.. No, I think this is called Blindshipping. I don't even know anymore. Herp derp.


Bah. I dunno why, but I wanted to write something sad. Ish. It's kind of sad, but it's happy-ish. Oh, just shut up and read it.

**- x - x - x - x - x -**

I miss you.

I miss that warmth in my body that I got from sharing it with you. I miss how my limbs used to move without me telling them to, because you were controlling them. I miss being able to close my eyes and gaze into yours.

It hasn't even been five minutes, and I already feel empty. Staring at the spot where you disappeared into the afterlife... where you belong.

Suddenly, I feel as though I have nothing to do here. Here, on this planet. Among the living. Without you. The prospect of life bores me. What do I do now...?

My friends cry and mourn on the way back home. I just sit here, numb, unsure of who I am.

So much of me... was _you_. And now, such a huge part of me is gone. Departed.

Dead.

You're _dead_. I watched you _die_.

This realization doesn't make me cry. It makes me _explode_. I can't stop the tears; I can't even breathe. I want to scream, but I can't draw enough breath to make a sound.

I miss the way you used to murmur in my ear, the sweet comforting nothings you would say to me whenever I felt depressed or hopeless. I miss the way you called me your _aibou_, your Little One, your beloved. I miss being able to _feel_ your spirit within me.

I'm scared of being alone.

**- x -**

I can't sleep anymore. It's too cold without you. Which is ridiculous, really, because physically, nothing has changed. It's difficult to explain the chill settling into me, even as I bundle myself up in numerous blankets. I shiver.

... I guess I'll be okay. Eventually. I'll move along. I have to, right? I can't just stay stuck in the past forever...

The more I tell myself that, the more I cling to your memory. The more I try to reason with myself, the more I miss you.

**- x -**

On the surface, nothing seems wrong. I put on my mask and go through my day like the "normal" young adult I'm supposed to be. Nobody can tell that I still haven't recovered.

They don't see what I see when I look in the mirror. They don't see a half-empty shell.

**- x -**

Five years have passed, and time has done nothing to ease my sorrow. My loneliness. My emptiness. My heartache. I wander through the abandoned labyrinth that was once your Soul's Room. None of the doors open anymore. I've tried each one at least twice. The walls and floors are cold and distant, dusty like the inside of a sealed tomb.

_Tomb._ That one word sparks a flurry of thoughts inside my head, and I finally land on one. A decision. The pull is too great. I can't resist it any longer.

**- x -**

I lower my hood as I step inside, out of the harsh glare of the sun. I'm surprised no one tries to stop me as I make my way to the room where we held our final duel. My footsteps echo around me, and I feel more alone than ever.

The ceremonial tablet seems to stare me in the face. My courage drains from me. Why did I return here? What did I think I would gain from this? Did I think I could bring you back? I don't even know anymore.

Your name escapes my lips as I lean my forehead against the cool stone. I place my fingertips on the tablet and gingerly caress it, wishing I could reach out and touch you so lovingly. I close my eyes against the tears, and I cling to the stone. It's cold. Cold like the sweet kiss of death.

And then... I feel something. Something I haven't felt since you left. It's like a warmth that awakens in the pit of my stomach, and slowly expands until it fills my entire body. A tingle in my fingertips, a sigh that trickles down my spine, a shiver across my skull. The void inside me doesn't feel so empty anymore...

A hand lifts to my face and wipes the tears away. I jerk back, my eyes flying open, but there's no one else in the room with me. The hand is indeed mine, but it moves without my instruction, caressing my cheek and brushing away the last of my unshed tears.

I find myself staring into your eyes as my own fall closed, and a rush of longing stabs me in the chest. Your eyes are the most amazing ruby-wine color; a specific shade I've never seen anywhere else. I step forward and brace myself against the stone tablet as I allow myself to retreat into my Soul's Room.

And there you are, standing before me in all your royal glory, no less beautiful than you were the last time I laid eyes on you. I fall in love all over again as I fall into your arms.

I've missed you.

**- x - x - x - x - x -**

I intentionally wrote this without any dialogue. I just like doing away with spoken words every so often. I think it kind of makes it more powerful or something.

I changed my mind about the epilogue. I'm just gonna leave this open for interpretation and speculation.


End file.
